My puppy has a problem. He lives to destroy any small appendange that may be on any of his toys. His pig has no ears and a mohawk, his duck has no bill, and his turtle has no legs.

Target has these really wonderful little stuffed dog toys that they sell for $1. I've bought several for Austen in the past, and when he was really little we brought one to my sister's house. Her dog Brie fell in love with it and stole it from Austen repeatedly. We finally left it there.

Christy then went out and bought several for Brie. When we came to visit a couple of weeks ago Austen immediately went to town pulling every single toy out of the toy basket so that he could play with one. I saw him playing with a little Target turtle toy and assumed it was the one we'd left there as it was missing a leg. At first I thought, "How cute! He knows that's his toy!" Then I realized that it was the wrong color. I got down on the floor and found not one, not two, but three turtles all missing at least one leg, most missing three or four. I asked Christy and she confirmed that before we arrived all of them had their limbs. So, on day one of our five day stay Austen had already maimed three toys.

Last week I went to Target and bought Austen and Brie some turtle toys. Five minutes after giving Austen one of them this is what it looked like:



After all of that heartless destruction, Austen needed a break:



Today, when we went outside for him to do his business I realized that I hadn't picked up any blue feet the day before. Why this moment for my realization? Because I picked up some blue poo, that's why. In case you were wondering, all four feet did, in fact, pass.

When I watched my brother's dog Bo and he ate a washcloth I blamed my inattention on the fact that I was used to only watching one dog. Now I think I'm just a bad dog mom. Good thing I don't have real kids.